Rejection Hits Different When You Know Yourself

Tanesha Moody
Sep 20
5 min read

Rejection Hits Different When You Know Yourself

As we continue exploring the "Preparing for Rejection" series, let’s dive into the heart of it all: knowing who we are and why we’re here. Understanding our identity and purpose gives us the resilience to navigate rejection without losing sight of our intrinsic value. It’s about grounding ourselves so deeply in who we are that rejection feels like a gust of wind—not a hurricane.

The Eccentric Art of Being Ourselves

My mom often uses the word “eccentric” to describe me. Honestly, I’ve embraced it. Alongside “weird,” it’s become a badge of honor. These words remind me that I’m unapologetically myself. And in moments of introspection (and maybe after a gin cocktail or two), I’ve realized a profound truth: I’m not everyone’s cup of tea—or their cocktail of choice.

And that’s okay.

Life’s hidden gems often lie in finding the people whose “weirdness” complements ours. Those who don’t just tolerate our quirks but celebrate them. I’m endlessly grateful for the tribe of people who “get” me and, even more so, for those who don’t but still shower me with love.

Why Rejection Can Feel Personal

Despite knowing we’re not for everyone, rejection still stings. It can feel personal, especially when it touches something close to our identity. Maybe it’s a job interview that didn’t go our way, a friendship that fizzled, or a romantic connection that didn’t click.

For many of us, belonging is deeply ingrained in our nature. We want to feel included, valued, and seen. So, when rejection happens, it’s easy to conflate the “no” we’ve received with a rejection of who we are at our core.

I’ve been there. I know the pain of feeling like an outsider, of not being fully accepted in spaces I desperately wanted to belong to—family, work, or social circles. But here’s the game-changer: separating rejection from our identity.

The Art of Separation: You Are Not Your Offer

Rejection often feels personal because it’s tied to something we’ve offered: our time, skills, energy, or even our love. But here’s the truth: rejection isn’t about us. It’s about the offer we’ve placed on the table.

Yes, our quirks and individuality might play a role in someone’s response, but that “no” isn’t a judgment of our worth or value. It’s a response to a specific invitation—not a reflection of our identity.

By learning to differentiate between the rejection of our offers and the rejection of ourselves, we take the first step toward navigating rejection with grace.

Who Are We, Really?

Defining who we are is a lifelong journey. Our identity isn’t static—it grows, evolves, and transforms with every experience. At its core, though, I believe our identity is made up of:

Core Values: The principles we hold dear and use to guide our decisions.
Beliefs: What we stand for, grounded in faith, philosophy, or personal conviction.
Authenticity: The unfiltered essence of who we are, free from societal expectations.
Purpose: The “why” that drives us forward, giving meaning to our actions.

These are the pillars of our identity. While external influences—like culture, relationships, and experiences—can shape us, they don’t define us. Knowing this helps us stay rooted when rejection tries to knock us off balance.

The Freedom in Self-Discovery

The journey to self-awareness is one of life’s greatest adventures. It’s not about perfection but about understanding. Who are we when no one’s watching? What do we stand for when the pressure’s on?

For me, this journey has been shaped by faith, books like The Values Factor and The Purpose-Driven Life, professional coaching, and moments of introspective silence. These tools have helped me uncover my purpose, align with my values, and show up authentically—even in the face of rejection.

But here’s the thing: this journey looks different for everyone. Your roadmap might include art, meditation, therapy, or community. What matters is that you’re on the path, learning and growing as you go.

Anchoring Ourselves Amid Rejection

When rejection hits, having a strong sense of who we are makes all the difference. Here’s how self-awareness becomes our superpower:

Separate the Offer from the Self: Rejection is about the opportunity, not the person. That job wasn’t the right fit. That relationship wasn’t aligned. The rejection doesn’t diminish our worth.
Reaffirm Our Core Values: Grounding ourselves in what we stand for helps us navigate rejection without losing sight of our purpose.
Celebrate Our Authenticity: We’re not for everyone, and that’s a good thing. The right opportunities and people will value us for who we are—not despite it.
Keep the Bigger Picture in Mind: Every rejection is a step closer to the path we’re meant to walk.

Turning Rejection Into Growth

Rejection doesn’t define us—it refines us. When we know who we are and what we’re about, rejection becomes less about loss and more about redirection. It’s a chance to align more closely with our values, refine our goals, and deepen our self-awareness.

The more we lean into this mindset, the easier it becomes to navigate rejection with resilience and even gratitude.

Final Thoughts: Embrace the Journey

Knowing who we are and what we stand for isn’t just about navigating rejection—it’s about living fully and authentically. It’s about showing up as our true selves, quirks and all, and trusting that the right opportunities, connections, and paths will align with our values.

So, the next time rejection comes knocking, take a deep breath. Remember who you are. Celebrate your uniqueness. And keep walking forward, knowing that every “no” brings you closer to what’s meant for you.

What’s one thing that anchors you when rejection hits? Let’s share and support each other in the comments. 🎉

Rejection Hits Different When You Know Yourself

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<!-- LinkedInContent: 💡 Rejection isn’t easy, but here’s the thing—it hits differently when you know who you are. 💡

When we separate our identity from the “no’s” we face, rejection stops feeling like a personal attack and starts feeling like…just an answer. It doesn’t define us. It doesn’t diminish our worth. Instead, it frees us to move forward with clarity and purpose.

In my latest blog, I dive into how knowing ourselves—our quirks, values, and unique magic—helps us navigate rejection with grace and resilience. It’s about staying anchored in who we are, even when the world tells us “not this time.”

✨ What if rejection wasn’t about who we are but simply about an offer not landing this time?

✨ How can knowing your purpose shift the way you experience rejection?

If rejection has ever made you question your worth, this one’s for you. Let’s reframe the narrative and keep showing up as our beautifully imperfect selves. 💪

Click below to read the full blog and let’s explore how to stay grounded through life’s “no’s.”

🙌 What’s one way you’ve stayed true to yourself in the face of rejection? Let’s share in the comments!

#RejectionGrowth #Resilience #MindsetShift #FullOutCoaching #LiveFullOut -->